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Part 6: Forgive and Forget



This study guide is provided for OneLife Home Groups to use as the guide for your time together. You can also use it to go deeper on your own throughout the week! Need to join a home group? Click here!



If you’ve given your life to Jesus, but haven’t gone public with your story through baptism, then it’s time to take that next step! Sign up at so that we can help you get started. Our next baptism services will be on Sunday, February 19 at our East Campus and February 26 at the North Campus.

Take a Next Step

Whether this is your first time attending OneLife, you’ve been coming for years, or anywhere in between, we believe there is a next step for you to take. From baptism, to joining OneLife as a partner, to volunteering, joining a home group, and more – there are plenty to choose from. Visit to sign up for your next step today.

Dominican Republic Mission Trip Interest Meeting

OneLife has an incredible partnership with churches and pastors in the Dominican Republic. Every year during the summer we take a team of volunteers down to visit these churches, serve some of the needs they have, and develop relationships with people in their community. If you would like to learn more about this year’s trip, come to the interest meeting after 2nd service on February 19th in the Meeting Room.

Starting Point – A New Sunday Morning Group

Everything has a starting point – your life, your relationships, your education, your career. Sometimes we forget that our faith has a starting point, or might need a new starting point. Beginning Sunday, February 19th at 11:15am in the Meeting Room of your campus, OneLife is hosting an 8-week small group study that will allow you to reflect on some different topics to find a new starting point for your faith. In addition, you’ll get to meet other OneLifers who you can connect with and get to know! So whether you’ve been attending OneLife for a few weeks or a few years, this is a great next step for anyone to take. 



Think back through Sunday’s message. What stuck out?

Key Scriptures:

Ephesians 4:31-32

Bottom Line:

Forgiving isn’t forgetting; it’s saying, “You don’t owe me anymore.”

Key Notes:

  • “Forgive and forget” is fake forgiveness!
  • Forgiveness is required when someone takes something from you.
  • Forgiveness is saying, “You don’t owe me anymore.”
  • Forgiveness is costly. Just ask Jesus how costly it is.
  • Only forgiven people can forgive.
  • At the cross we lost our ability to not forgive.
  • Debt Canceled: Identify who you are angry with. Who do you have imaginary conversations with?
  • Decide what they took from you: You can’t forgive what you can’t define.
  • Decide to cancel the debt: What do I need to do to release the debt?


Start Talking – Get the conversation started!

  • Has anyone ever told you to just forgive and forget when something happened to you? Give an example and share how that did or didn’t make any sense at the time.
  • Have you ever had someone say they forgave and forgot something you did, but it was obvious that they didn’t forgive and definitely didn’t forget it!?

Start Thinking

  • Read Isaiah 43:25. Why does this verse lead some to think “Forgive and Forget” is something God says? What does this verse really mean?
  • Read Ephesians 4:31-32. If you flip this passage around, it tells us what not forgiving someone will lead to. What is it? How can this help you determine whether or not you’ve forgiven someone?
  • What is the command you see in Ephesians 4:32, and why are we commanded to do it? What does this teach about God?
  • Read Matthew 18:21-22. What is Jesus teaching in his answer to Peter about how many times we should forgive someone?

Start Sharing

  • What is the hardest part about forgiving someone as much as Jesus says you should forgive them?
  • Stop and think about this: how often do you hurt Jesus and want him to forgive you? (Stop and answer this question as a group!) Now, reconsider the previous question. If you remind yourself how much and how often Jesus forgives you, does it change how you might answer that question? How so?
  • If forgiveness means not wanting to get even any longer or not wanting to pay someone back for something they did or took, how does it change the way you think about the people that have hurt you or taken something from you?
  • How can you forgive someone like Jesus says to do without becoming a “doormat”? How can you offer forgiveness and yet still set boundaries?

 Start Doing

  • Each person was given “homework” at the end of the sermon on Sunday. Share your answers to each of the following:
  • 1.Debt Canceled: Identify who you are angry with. Who do you have imaginary conversations with?
  • 2.Decide what they took from you: You can’t forgive what you can’t define.
  • 3. Decide to cancel the debt: What do I need to do to release the debt?.
  • How did Jesus do each of those three for you? How does that give you a story to tell someone who is far from God or struggling with faith?

Start Praying

  • As you pray, thank God for loving you so much that he forgives you seventy times seven! 
  • Confess to God how you withhold forgiveness to others in your attempt to control, get even, or take back what they took from you.
  • Ask God to help you offer the same forgiveness to those in your life that He gives freely to you.

Start Digging

  • Matthew 18:15-35

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